June 9, 2012 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
My (Paula) attention is often peaked when people use the word “drama” to define their behavior. It seems to me to be a word that dismisses the reality of emotion. Having been around little girls between the ages of 3 and whatever, I do understand the origin of the word’s misuse; however the overuse of […]
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Marriage Counseling – San Luis Obispo, CA
Keeping Your Love Alive: 4 Ways to Avoid Marriage Failure
February 21, 2016 / by Paula / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
Keeping the fires burning and the love alive in marriage may not come naturally. The new-love hormone, dopamine, begins to fade after the first year or two of relationship. What then? How do you keep love alive and your relationship healthy and vibrant? Our brain, memories and emotion: What makes us feel close to each […]
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How Fear of Codependency Can Backfire
February 9, 2016 / by Paula / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
Beth was days away from her storybook wedding. Her excitement about beginning life with the man of her dreams radiated through her giddy smile. All her friends were doing it. And finally it was her turn. What could be wrong with this picture? Only Beth knew of the knot she secretly harbored in her gut. […]
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Attachment and Violent Anger Part II: 4 Dangerous Ways to Express Our Anger
January 24, 2016 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles
In Attachment and Violent Anger Part I, I talked about how attachment with caregivers in our early-years causes us to form either a positive trusting view of our selves and others or a view that is negative and mistrustful. Loss of attachment is critically dangerous to human beings. When people trapped in the World Trade […]
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Tandem Marriage: Being Your Best Self With The Person You Love
January 22, 2016 / by Paula / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
What is Tandem Marriage? Merriam Webster defines “tandem” as: a group of two people or things that work together; in partnership or in conjunction. If you have read through some of our previous Tandem Marriage blog posts, you’ll know that Michael and I ride a tandem racing bike, a bicycle-built-for-two. We have covered a bunch […]
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Attachment and Violent Anger – Part 1: How They Are Connected
January 18, 2016 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles
How are Attachment and Violent Anger Connected? Understanding the connection between intimacy and anger is important for improving our own relationship, and if you are a therapist like me knowing how to help others. Some couples I work with are so stuck in a cycle of anger that the emotional communication work I normally do […]
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The Genetics and Neuroscience of Love
August 25, 2012 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles
Neuroscience is on the hunt for the essence of what connects us. The evidence is now clear that we are connected with each other emotionally in deeper ways than we have been able to imagine. Louis Cozolino in the book “The Neuroscience of Human Relationships” writes: “There are no single brains…Through the biochemical alchemy of […]
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First Experience Of Tandem Marriage
August 9, 2012 / by Michael & Paula Regier / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
Are you and your partner in sync? Do you do life in tandem? Or have you developed parallel lives? What might a tandem marriage look like for you? Here’s the beginning of our tandem marriage story. I (Paula) was at work when I got the pic on my cell phone…a beautiful red bicycle-built-for-two strapped to […]
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Fulfllment and Attachment
July 6, 2012 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles
What happens in any relationship when one discovers a repressed part of oneself and now has a new passion for life? Such was the case for me (Michael) when I discovered the challenge and excitement of cycling. It felt great to feel my physical strength again. The college linebacker in me could now be expressed […]
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The Science of Brag and Bash Leadership
June 27, 2012 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles
One of the most difficult types of organizations to work with is one which is controlled by what I call “brag and bash leadership.” It does not take a lot of looking around to notice leaders with a very black and white view of the “good and bad” people within their sphere of influence. They […]
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Drama or Authentic Distress
June 9, 2012 / by Michael Wayne Regier Ph.D. / Relational Excellence Articles, Tandem Marriage
My (Paula) attention is often peaked when people use the word “drama” to define their behavior. It seems to me to be a word that dismisses the reality of emotion. Having been around little girls between the ages of 3 and whatever, I do understand the origin of the word’s misuse; however the overuse of […]
Read more